A Bit of Appreciation Can Boost Your Relationships
In the faster, bigger and better world we live in now, sometimes the small acts of appreciation we used to do without much thought in relationships get overlooked. Whether you are in a new relationship or have been in one for awhile, what is strongly remembered are the small acts of appreciation that was given or NOT given. I have found through the years of counseling and psychic advice, it is the small thoughtful actions that seem to stay with us and when they are no longer part of the relationship, the energy changes.
How those moments of appreciation work on a psychological and emotional level is it supports your partner’s self-esteem, makes them feel good and increases their desire to want to give you more. When we show appreciation, which is our gratitude and recognition of someone’s quality, value, significance to you, we actually become better people for it too. The more you take your conversation, emotions and thoughts off “what happened to me today” and just even take a few moments to learn to appreciate others, it can help you become a happier person. The best learning part of this exercise is to express your appreciation, sincerely and without the expectation of anything in return. A by-product of appreciating others is you start to appreciate yourself more too, and that is another step towards loving yourself and your ability to not hold back but share that love in your relationships.
Story continues below…
When you show appreciation in even the smallest ways to your loved ones, you build a bond of trust and love in that relationship. That also goes for slight acquaintances and even strangers. You will be amazed at how you can brighten a person’s day up just by showing appreciation they held the door open for you, let you ahead in the grocery line or gave you first choice on a coveted parking spot at the crowded mall.
Appreciation of others expands our humble and generous nature, which we are all capable of. It is not martyrdom or a sense of “oh, they deserve to have that more than me”, it is a true emotion of expressing caring and honoring of another human being. Regardless of whether you are involved with them or not.
When we stop appreciating each other in a relationship, we start taking each other for granted. Shining the positive light on your partner does not depreciate you, it does just the opposite. All of a sudden, you look pretty good in the eyes of whomever you have just pointed out something positive about them. It’s an absolute! And what you will find, the more you find appreciation of others in any relationship, suddenly that appreciative energy is coming back to you, which makes you feel great too!
Below are some small suggestions that we might have taken for granted in our relationships that just need a little dusting off. It may feel a little rusty at first to use them but gradually, you will find yourself saying appreciative things every chance you get. Why? Because it makes YOU feel great!
- When your partner or anyone is speaking with you, make eye contact and LISTEN! Put the texting away or checking out what is going on around you.
- Say ‘Thank You’ a lot! And no, a grunt of appreciation is not the same! Connect with your partner when they do something just for you, even if it is only getting your coffee from the table.
- Verbally acknowledging the skills they use everyday (and we take for granted), like taking out the trash, making the bed or just leaving the front porch light on for you when you are running late.
- Express what you love about your partner to your family and friends once in awhile, in front of them. Yes, they may get embarrassed but do it anyway. Everyone will feel great about what was said, even if it comes with a little teasing.
- Tease and be playful with each other. So often we focus on each other’s faults that we forget the person we are with used to make us laugh and feel good about ourselves. Renew that energy!
- Be considerate of your partner’s time. If you are a constant “late show”, make more of an effort to value your partner’s time too and work on getting ready to go out or show up on time.
Susan Z’s Verdict
These are just a few small overlooked behavior changes that we can make. We all have a tendency to fall into that ‘comfort zone’ of taking others for granted. These are just minor adjustments that we might not even know we are not doing anymore but once we consciously make that effort of appreciation again, it will change the energy of every relationship, including the one you have with your self-esteem.
Susan Z Rich is an emotional addiction counselor, spiritual intuitive and holistic therapist. She counsels others to see life in a more positive way and teaches personal accountability for life choices. She is also the author of several children’s books and Soul Windows…Secrets From The Divine.