Break Up Etiquette

Break Up Etiquette

Neil Sedaka’s song “Breakin Up Is Hard to Do” is spot on when it comes to love relationships. It’s painful whether you’re ending the relationship or being dumped. The majority of people will experience both in their lifetime.

Before calling off your relationships, take time to ponder why. Please don’t break up if it’s for the following two manipulative reasons:

1. You think or have a feeling that your partner is leaving you; therefore, instead of looking like the loser or to ease the pain, you rather beat them to the punch.
2. You are using it as an ultimatum to advance the relationship to a higher level.

Those actions are unhealthy ways of dealing with a relationship. Be a grownup, go through your fears and insecurities, and communicate in a healthy manner. This action will assist you to grow, whatever the outcome of the relationship.

3 Thing to Avoid

Let’s say you know for sure that it’s time for you to move on. Avoid doing these three actions:

1. Breaking up over the phone, in a text, an email, or written note. This is just plain rude, besides being immature! Unless your mate has a history of violence, it’s ethical and good karma to do it face to face for relationship closure. Talk to your soon to be ex in a “private” place to allow them to ask questions, have their say, and express emotions.
2. Say that horrible phrase, “It’s me, not you.” If this is truly the case, then an explanation is required for the reason of why “it’s me,” plus what are the good qualities are of “not you.”
3. Leave out the fact you are leaving your mate for another person, so you won’t have to watch their reaction. This is cruel because they will figure it out in the future, whether on their own or from someone else. Be honest, yet without insulting them.

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5 Responses to Resist

When the shoe is on the other foot and you’re the one being broken up with, please “resist” the following five responses:

1. Don’t respond with violence to your ex or his/her property.
2. Resist constantly texting, calling, or viewing your former partner’s social media pages.
3. Keep clear of your ex’s home or hangouts.
4. Abstain from contacting the person your mate left you for.
5. Recoil from entering a new relationship to soothe your ego, as it’s not fair to use him/her for your temporary relief.

On either side of the breakup fence, it’s uncomfortable, and there may be a part of you that desires to act foolish. Before you speak or take actions on something you could regret later or end up behind bars; take a time out to think about your responses. Preferably, spend time alone to release the pain.

Pamela Cummins

Pamela Cummins is a relationship expert who teaches you how to empower yourself to empower your relationships. She is the author of four books, including Psychic Wisdom on Love and Relationships.