How Are Your Conversational Skills In A Relationship?

Whether it be the budding perspective of a new relationship or one that has lots of mileage on it, the most important foundations that you put down as to whether it will be long term or possibly just one date is communication.

How well do you speak to each other and listen, I mean really listen! When two people come together for those first hours, there is sooooo much that can be discussed just getting to know about one another. The true test comes after the fist few dates and all the particulars have been gone over and the toughest test is when you have been with someone for a length of time.

I have seen couples at restaurants that barely talk with each other, reading a paper, texting, talking on the phone or more intrigued with what is going on around them than who is sitting at the table with them. You wonder what happened to that magick sparkle they once had when they held each other’s eye contact, listened to every word, asked questions and were truly interested in what their partner had to say to them.

I have often seen that longing look, usually from the woman in a couple, when they see a new relationship connection with all the hand holding, giggling, eye contact and constant verbal connection.

Whether you are just dating someone new or you have been involved with someone for a length of time, here are some good guidelines to keep your conversations between the two of you or even a few other couples who are attending, lively and interesting.

Listed below are some simple boundaries that we are actually aware of but sometimes forget once we get comfortable with a partner or become a little anxious on those first few dates.

Susan Z’s Verdict

My ex-husband was probably the best conversationalist I have ever known, always the right thing to bring the conversation into a comfortable flow. But I also saw him speechless once and I never forgot that we all have moments when we just really don’t know where to take the next part of the conversation. If you have a comfortable relationship, shake it up a little with a topic not normally discussed between the two of you. If you are new dates and have one of those “awkward silent” moments, laugh about it. It is not the end of the world and it will usually start a new, lighter conversation.


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1. EYE CONTACT!

This will always be first on any list of making a good impression. The person who is speaking with you wants to know who you are and the eyes are the windows of the soul. If you cannot make good eye contact, it leaves the impression you are lacking self-esteem, intimidated or trying to hide something about yourself. Not a good first impression nor one with someone you have been with for awhile.

2. Slow your speech down

I am not saying to have a conversation like you are on drugs but speak clearly. We all have a tendency of speaking too fast when we are nervous. The old fashioned public speaking trick actually works, imagine everyone naked and it will help with those first date jitters and can get pretty funny .

3. Don’t interrupt!

This falls into both categories of new dates and established relationships. When we are nervous, we want to add our input to make a good impression. When we have been together for awhile, we might fall into the habit of “finishing” each other’s sentences or dis-respecting the fact your partner has something valid to say to you.

4. Watch your body language!

Have you ever noticed that couples who are really interested in what each other has to say, their body is alert and poised with anticipation? That is of course, what they call hanging onto every word but in every conversation, new dates or seasoned relationships, you want that physical energy there. Showing you are receptive to what is being said to you and interested.

5. Notice details

In new dating situations, notice something an average person doesn’t notice and bring those details into the conversation. For example: they have an unusual ring or watch on, you pick up an accent you are unfamiliar with or a piece of clothing that is worn. This impresses someone in an elegant manner without going overboard.

6. Give and take

Keep track of how long you have been talking about yourself, then turn the conversation fully on them. Ask questions, new dates such as where you were born, went to school, hobbies etc. Established relationships, what’s new that you don’t know about, whether it be family, school, kids, jobs or what’s in the news. Best to stay out of politics, even if you are of the same party. Always end your answers with a question – this way, they will have to say something.

Susan Z’s Verdict

My ex-husband was probably the best conversationalist I have ever known, always the right thing to bring the conversation into a comfortable flow. But I also saw him speechless once and I never forgot that we all have moments when we just really don’t know where to take the next part of the conversation. If you have a comfortable relationship, shake it up a little with a topic not normally discussed between the two of you. If you are new dates and have one of those “awkward silence” moments, laugh about it. It is not the end of the world and it will usually start a new, lighter conversation.


Considering getting a psychic reading? We have carefully screened and selected a range of gifted, compassionate psychic readers to provide clarity and new insights into your life. Online psychics available 24/7.

 

Author

Susan Z Rich is an emotional addiction counsellor, spiritual intuitive and holistic therapist. She counsels others to see life in a more positive way and teaches personal accountability for life choices. She is also the author of several children’s books and Soul Windows … Secrets From The Divine.

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