How To Know When Someone is Lying to You

How To Know When You Are Being Lied To

Being lied to is always a conversation that is never without a tremendous about of emotions when a friend, family member, child or romantic partner that has an issue with discerning truth from a lie. It brings out every ounce of anger, compassion, betrayal and judgement that we were not aware was there. Empaths have an advantage of “sensing” an un-truth. They may not be able to put an explanation to it, but they feel something is “off” with when they are being lied to.

Liars are known to “study” the person they hope to take advantage of. In other words, they look for weaknesses.
They lack empathy for the other person. The liar does not have any moral consciousness of how their lies make you feel. A well versed, body reading and manipulative person can sometimes get past the best of us. Addressing the anger part and letting it go, we look to find compassion somewhere in our hearts, as pathological lying is a mental disorder and should be treated as such.

So how do you recognize you are being lied to before you get duped too many times, that you are dealing with a person who seems to live in their own fantasy world and have no moral compass when it comes to telling the truth?

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Here are what the professionals say to look for.

1. Inconsistency in what they are relating to you. We tend to think that liars are the ones who can’t keep their stories straight, but we’ll list this so-called habit first because it is the least reliable. If the story changes everytime you hear it, then you may have something there but most truthful people, when they’re asked to retell a story several times, will remember additional details each time–which means the stories they tell will change but the core of the story remains the same.
2. Suspicious expressions. There are some telltale signs, besides nervousness, that can suggest the lack of truthfulness. Blushing, blinking, flared nostrils, fake smiles. Notice them, remember them, pay attention. Don’t solely bank on these as even trained, experienced interrogators find it difficult to pick out a liar solely on the basis of facial expressions.
3. Asking you to repeat the question to stall for time. Figuring out how much you know, so they can work around it.
4. Unnecessary over the top descriptive words. Absolutely. Tremendous. Literally. Incredible! People, who insist on peppering their speech with them might be trying to bolster their argument or distract you.
5. A desire to move away from the subject as quick as possible. Again, this isn’t a foolproof tell, but it’s another piece of evidence to consider as you weigh the likelihood that you’re being told something untruthful.
6. Reminding you several times that in general, most people are not honest. How? By using phrases like, “In all candor” or “If I’m being completely truthful” or “If I had to swear on a stack of Bibles … ” Think of it like that old saying, “If you have to ask, you can’t afford it.” If you have to emphasize that you’re telling the truth, you might well be lying.
7. Uses the word NO often in the conversation. When people “say no and look in a different direction,” “say no and close their eyes,” “say no after hesitating,” “say noooooooo, stretched over a long period of time,” or “say no in a singsong manner, you can be pretty much be assured you are being lied to.”
8. Inappropriate emotions. Over the top emotions in relating a story such as; terrible news told with a joking attitude. Supposedly good news with a flat toned-down enthusiasm.
9. When talking to you, you can see and hear contempt for you in their voice or body mannerism. As though you are too “stupid” to get it! Because contempt is a combination of anger, moral superiority and marked by one lip corner pulled up in an asymmetrical expression, you can rest assured, they will embellish their story to make them feel superior to you.
10. Nothing is just commonplace, but always exaggerated and at drama queen level.

Susan Z

Susan Z Rich is an emotional addiction counselor, spiritual intuitive and holistic therapist. She counsels others to see life in a more positive way and teaches personal accountability for life choices. She is also the author of several children’s books and Soul Windows…Secrets From The Divine.