Letting Go Of Body Shaming

Letting Go Of Body Shaming

In our social culture, it seems the new trolling sport is body shaming, where women are of course its favorite target. Either you’re too fat, too thin, looked like you put a little weight on there, huh? And of course, the impossible role models they have given us since the 60’s of the requirement to look like a Victoria Secret runway model. It’s bad enough that women have to deal with it from the those looking at you from the outside but the biggest crime is that we as women, have given cultural permission to constantly criticize ourselves.

We have seen “big” models, who are basically around a size 12 and have seen representatives of almost every body size and shape. We have movies that are now showing that you can revel in your womanly sexiness no matter what size you are. But those are the movies and the runways. What would happen if you put down the whip you’ve been flogging yourself with for decades of not having the perfect body, stop dieting (they don’t work), stop the plastic surgery for enhancements or reductions and really honored and liked the body you’re in?

The first thing would be that you would stop trying to change your body into something it may not want to be. If you are a big girl, maybe your body is happy with that and if you stop trying to emulate someone one else’s version of beauty and accept that it comes in all sizes, shapes and colors. Paris men think American women are to big, Italian men think Paris women are too skinny, African men like a woman with a little meat on her bones, Russian men like them big bosomed and big bottoms. It’s only you that you see in the mirror and if you learn to love her the way she is at the moment, the rest will come. You have to learn how to have a “tude” about your body. Listed below are the illusions women have about how men think about a woman’s body and who they get interested in. We don’t come in cookie cutter size and neither do they.

Story continues below…

1. Men can definitely sense when you are not proud of your body, regardless of the jiggles, no boobs or thunder thighs. YOU are the one who puts the thoughts in their head that your body is not so great!
2. Do whatever you need to do to push every single limiting thought out of your head as it occurs and replace it with a positive affirmation. It’s just programming. You are beautiful no matter what you look like.
3. If you have some issues with how your body looks at the moment, fake it till you make it! Turn down the lights. Wear lingerie that covers the parts you don’t like. Whatever you are working with, take care of it by staying clean and pampering your body every chance you get.
4. Know that in this moment you are as young as you’ll ever be. Don’t wait for perfection. There is NO such thing! It never comes. But what perfection really is; allowing yourself to love your imperfections and getting intimate with another human being who adores you, flaws and all.
5. Finally, men are not that picky. Women are our own worst enemies about our bodies and our sexual fantasies of what we think men are looking for. Men want you to show your desire. Men want to see you nude and they love you for exactly who you are. Men love women who are sexually confident without hang ups. Once again, flaws and all.
6. Ask your partner to tell you what they love about your body. Get them to use as many specifics as possible and take it all in. Really be present and listen to what they love about your body. They are with you because there is something, they find beautiful about you and if you can see the same thing, you are on your way!
7. NEVER, ever compare yourself to someone else. What someone thinks is horrendous about their body, you would give anything to have. Being overweight is not considered fat everywhere and with everyone and thin is not considered sexy everywhere and with everyone.

Susan Z

Susan Z Rich is an emotional addiction counselor, spiritual intuitive and holistic therapist. She counsels others to see life in a more positive way and teaches personal accountability for life choices. She is also the author of several children’s books and Soul Windows…Secrets From The Divine.