The Negative Side of Having Too Many Desires

How Too Many Desires Can Make You Unhappy

Not a day goes by that we do not read or hear about going after our desires and how to make them happen. It is part of what makes life so interesting, exciting, hopeful and a great learning experience for the soul. Desiring what we don’t have in our life at the moment is always about going after the dream and if we don’t have dreams, hopes and expectation of a better future or a vision of a life of what we have don’t have within our grasp, would be pretty bleak. It makes life as a kid waiting for Christmas Day and all the expectations that go with it.

But when those desires go negative, they can make you unhappy when you start comparing them to the life you have at the moment and take the approach that you have less than what your desires would give you. It is what staying in the moment is all about, oh and the gratitude thing is also an important moment to grasp everyday. Here is what happens when you take all your energy and only focus on what you desire but don’t have and do not stay in gratitude for the moment you are living in. Face it, this moment IS the only moment you can live in and if you feel it is lacking because you don’t have something or someone in it, then you fall into the danger of missing the only moment you have going for you, NOW! If you project into the future or dwell in the past on desires not found or desires still wanting, you can seriously fall into the rabbit hole of being unhappy and dissatisfied with your life everyday.

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Below is a list of habits we can easily fall into if we dwell too much in the energy of: “when I get that or when he shows up”, then I will be happy.

1. You worry. In reality what has worrying about something ever benefited you or changed anything. Worry only creates inner turmoil.
2. You hold onto the idea of control. There is no such thing. The only control you do have in any situation is how you handle it.
3. You feel anger that you have not been given your heart’s desire yet. We pretty much all get what we ask for in life. How it shows up depends on the energy of either uplifting gratitude or still feeling it still didn’t give you what you wanted.
4. You believe everyone should participate and go by your rules in making your desires become a reality. Hey, they are your wants and desires, everyone else are bit players just participating.
5. You compare yourself to others who have what you desire. Jealousy and envy can take away all the happiness you could experience every day because you missed the gifts that were given to you.
6. You make a choice that you can only be happy when all of your dreams come true. The term “all of your dreams” is unending. If you get what your heart desires, you then desire something else. The cycle will never be broken and allow you to experience present happiness with who you are and what you have. Most people depend on others to gain happiness, but the truth is, it always comes from within.”
7. You are a glass-half-empty person. Pessimism will give you a life of always only noticing what you have not gotten and don’t have. Makes for a sour attitude.
8. You determine that if you can’t have your desired gift, then you will fill it with materialism, drugs or alcohol. Pity parties are very unattractive and before you know it, you are surrounded by people of like and kind and a joyless existence.
9. You don’t make time for the things you can enjoy right now because you are still waiting for your next desire to show up, so why bother. Your fear of failing at getting what your heart desires is so strong, you don’t even want to try.
10. You stay stuck in the past and begin every day with holding onto what didn’t go right in the past instead of just letting it go. Can’t change it, so why hold onto it?

Susan Z

Susan Z Rich is an emotional addiction counselor, spiritual intuitive and holistic therapist. She counsels others to see life in a more positive way and teaches personal accountability for life choices. She is also the author of several children’s books and Soul Windows…Secrets From The Divine.