Toxic Friendships: When it is Time to Part Ways
We spend a lot of time discussing romantic relationships and healthy boundaries within them, but when it comes to friendships, sometimes we forget to draw a line between what is acceptable and what is not.
Friendships can turn sour or lose their purpose over time, and it is hard to let go of a person who has been there for quite a long time, even if their presence has not been particularly positive lately. The following list will help you discern if it is time to part ways with a toxic friend or if the situation can be redirected by setting some boundaries.
1. Your friend is always demanding favors
Here we are not talking about the occasional favor that every friend asks for once in a while, but favors turned into demands that, when not satisfied, turn you into the evil witch of the movie. Solution: No is a complete sentence. Try to discuss your limits with your friend and encourage their independence. If setting boundaries doesn’t work, maybe it’s time to let go.
Story continues below…
2. Your friend makes you feel like you two are in constant competition
If you have a problem, they have it worse. If you have a victory, they have it better. No matter what you’re saying, the conversation automatically turns to them and their life, with little room to discuss your own situation and poor reciprocity. Solution: Let them know that you are feeling ignored, and maybe try to redirect the conversation with a sentence along the lines of “I would really like you to listen to this” to bring their interruptions to their awareness. Again, if this doesn’t work, perhaps you need to think of a more drastic solution.
3. Your friend is an “opinologyst”
Whenever you say something about your life, be it a new relationship, a new project, an idea or a plan for the future, your friend feels the need to add their input, whether welcomed or not, and they usually end up making you feel terrible about what you were previously excited for. It is true that sometimes our friends can see things that we are not able to see from the inside of our situation, but if they consistently turn every exciting news into misery, it is time to say bye.
4. There are too many topics to avoid
The relationship has come to a point where there is too much resentment and there are a number of subjects that cannot be brought up without causing a fight. If you cannot feel comfortable around your friend, it is time to part ways.
5. Your friend doesn’t respect you
The more we trust people, the more likely we are to make certain transgressions, however, if we are constantly attacked by our friends or disrespected, and they don’t seem to modify a behavior that is hurtful to you, it is time to find new friends.
Comments are closed.